I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
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