Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
