Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
You're a waste of cheezeits
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
