Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
