dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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