That's intense
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Randomize
