# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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