we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Randomize