I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Randomize
