he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
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