I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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