he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
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