my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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