So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
