I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
