I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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