its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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