This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize