RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
