What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
