Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
