I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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