Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Randomize