Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We need to get me chipped asap
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize