i wish my penis had a tongue
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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