Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize