Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
