Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
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No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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