I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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