so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
