let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize