i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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