why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
