But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
