she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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