Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize