Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
