Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
This is my gift to your gina
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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