Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I just found puke in my bra..
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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