dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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