so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
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