? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
