Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
