if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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