id be glad to
he wants to bone in the snuggie
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
