another moral hangover. fuck.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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