I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
