He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
