I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
