You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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